May 2011
Going for my "job interview"
Oh lawd, please just let my rub kitties all over my face and get paid goddamn.
In reality you will be cleaning up shit for 5 hours
If I worked at a restaurant on Valentine's Day I would put a fake engagement ring in every girl's drink.
Just to look at her act like:
Then watch the dude sit there like:
Facebook,
no notifications
your ex looks adorable, and has a new girlfriend
someone tries and starts a poke war
reading some ones fight
1 new message from your crush
somebody posts something rude aimed you
mohammed akajamalarmaladee adds you…
looking through some skanks thousands of selfies
reading some bitches song lyric status
people post ”gettinggg drunkk”
groups filling up my newsfeed
move onto TUMBLR
